Snow Latinx & The Seven Diversity Hires

Disney Goes Achondroplasiaphobic

I used to be Snow White, but I drifted. —Mae West

Heigh-ho, heigh-ho, it’s off to Woke we go. Yes, this is gonna be one of those essays, and before you ask—no. I haven’t seen it. No one has. I freely admit that I’m preemptively piling on with the other bitches and getting all “Miss Crabtree” about the forthcoming live action Disney regurgitation of Snow White. Why? Because it’s fun.

No, I didn’t get the title wrong—yes, I know, the original, first-ever Disney animated feature (and timeless masterpiece) is Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs. But ugh, (eyeroll)—it’s soooo 1937. In these progressive times, when we’re oh-so-evolved and sophisticated that we simply have to take cherished, simple things from the past and twist them into tortured, distorted insipidities, well, we thought we’d just, ya know, cut the dwarfs. Because depictions of dwarfs are so offensive…to…dwarfs?

Let’s get into this. First, let’s go back to 1812, and the O.G. The tale written by the Brothers Grimm: Sneewittchen, or Little Snow-white. There are some bizarre and fascinating features in the original story, and its interesting to observe how Disney interpreted it via a 1930s Hollywood romanticism.

The story opens with the image of a beautiful queen, sitting in an open window with a black ebony frame, sewing, gazing at the falling snow. She pricks her finger with her needle. Three red drops of blood fall on the virgin snow. So enraptured by the image, the queen wishes for a child “as white as snow, as red as blood, and as black as this frame.” She soon gives birth to a child as white as snow, as red as blood…you get it. She’s named “Little Snow-white.” We are left unclear as to what was white, red and black about Little Snow-white, but Disney cleared that one up for us—in Technicolor. So, the good queen dies, and the king marries another equally beautiful but evil queen. Wicked stepmothers figure frequently in Grimm—and in Disney as well. When queenie meanie’s magic mirror decrees Snow White the fairest in the land—at seven years of age, little Snow White, indeed—she puts out a hit on her, sending her huntsman to kill the kid and bring back her heart. We know the general gist of the next part: Little Snow-white pleads for her life, huntsman takes pity on her, lets her escape into the woods, and brings back a boar’s heart, pretending it’s the girl’s. The Grimms add this grim detail: The cook had to salt this, and the wicked Queen ate it, and thought she had eaten the heart of Snow-white. Oh, those kooky Germans. Some bedtime story.

Hermann Vogel, cover, Brüder Grimm, Kinder-und Hausmärchen, 1894

Let’s get to the dwarfs. I have a theory that this particular fairy tale was intended to not only teach children about the sin of vanity, and to scare the crap out of them, but to introduce basic math. Thus, Little Snow-white is seven years old; she stumbles upon the cottage in the woods of the seven mountains, and finds there seven little chairs, and seven little plates, and seven little mugs (clearly, we’re teaching how to count to seven) and it is in the glow of their seven candles that the seven dwarfs first behold Snow White, sleeping peacefully in one of their seven beds.

Now, I find this bit of detail rather interesting. When Snow White arrives at the cottage, it’s described thusly (in Margaret Hunt’s 1880s translation):

Everything in the cottage was small, but neater and cleaner than can be told. There was a table on which was a white cover, and seven little plates, and on each plate a little spoon; moreover, there were seven little knives and forks, and seven little mugs. Against the wall stood seven little beds side by side, and covered with snow-white counterpanes.

So, the dwarfs are very clean and neat. This is not the case with Disney’s “Doc,” “Sleepy,” et al. They’re more like messy little boys. The animated Snow White (who is at least a decade older than the Grimm’s “Little Snow-white” and way more glamorous) takes it on herself, upon arrival, to give the dirty cottage a thorough cleaning, with the help of some woodland creatures, all “whistling while they work.” Disney, notorious for finding a winning formula and recycling it time and time again, repeats this cheerful housework theme in Cinderella, who scrubs floors warbling a song, whilst enlisting the domestic skills of vermin named Gus and Jaq (who are also keen dressmakers). Disney’s Snow White becomes a sort of mother to the dwarfs. I’m inclined to infer a little influence, perhaps, from J.M. Barrie’s Peter Pan, in which Wendy assumes the role of mother to the Lost Boys, playing house with them in the Wendy House. Seeking to appeal to 1930s America, it wouldn’t be beyond a Hollywood studio to promote the virtues of learning early in girlhood to be a good housewife and mother.

So. The Grimm’s dwarfs are neat and tidy, hard working, talented, and incredibly devoted—as we learn when they foil one after another of the evil queen’s attempts to off Little Snow-white. When the poison apple appears to have succeeded, the dwarfs craft a glass and gold casket to display, for all eternity, the princess who magically remains beautiful even in death. Oh yeah—in the old tale, she’s dead. Not asleep. In Disneyland, yes, asleep—but in the land of the Grimm, it’s way more grim. She’s dead, and the dwarfs maintain prayerful vigil by her monument…until the prince guy comes along. Then things get weird.

He said to the dwarfs, "Let me have the coffin, I will give you whatever you want for it." But the dwarfs answered, "We will not part with it for all the gold in the world." Then he said, "Let me have it as a gift, for I cannot live without seeing Snow-white. I will honour and prize her as my dearest possession." As he spoke in this way the good dwarfs took pity upon him, and gave him the coffin.

Um…eew.

So, the prince wants to make Snow White’s funeral bier part of his castle decor and admire her dead body like a taxidermy exhibit. I find that way more “cringe” than an unconscious princess roused by love’s first kiss, consensual or no. By the way, Little Snow-white isn’t reanimated by a kiss in the original tale. The henchmen of the prince, while carrying off the coffin, stumble, dislodging the piece of apple stuck in her throat, and surprise!—she turns out not to be dead after all. It’s not some creepy non-consensual kiss that revives her, just a klutz tripping on a tree root. Feminist fist-pumpers rejoice.

But I digress. Dwarves. The Bros Grimm depict the dwarfs—as does Disney—as miners for gold and precious gems. This trope arises from ancient legend, particularly Norse mythology, which tells of dwarfs who mine for gold and are skilled artisans; forging, for example, the spear of Odin, and Thor’s hammer. J.R.R. Tolkien elaborated on these motifs in The Lord of the Rings, principally through the leading character of Gimli, the dwarf warrior member of the Fellowship of the Ring—ironically played in the Peter Jackson movie franchise by non-dwarf actor John Rhys-Davies (the actor was, despite playing a dwarf, the tallest member of the cast, at 6’1”). In 2021, 4’1” performer Brett Beattie, credited as Rhys-Davies’ stunt double, broke his silence in an interview with Polygon.com, revealing that he performed much of the role of Gimli: 189 days of shooting, during which he sustained injuries in the battle sequences that resulted in three knee surgeries. This unsung hero was not credited for his performance in this major dwarf part. Now, in the name of “progressivism” dwarf parts are being eliminated altogether—made into non-dwarf parts, thus taking away opportunities for dwarf actors—credited or no—to do that work and make those salaries.

I see nothing whatsoever derogatory or offensive about the depiction of the seven dwarfs, even in the barbaric Grimm’s tale, that features numerous assassination attempts on a child, attempted cannibalism, oh yes—and the grisly murder of the evil queen at Little Snow-white’s wedding, where she’s forced to dance herself to death in red hot iron shoes. Eek, talk about the hotfoot. The dwarfs come out the clear heroes of this fairy tale. Yes, they’re made cuddly and childlike in the Disney film (gee, why would you do that in a children’s movie?), but I still fail to see how these cartoon cuties could illicit this statement from award-winning dwarf actor, Peter Dinklage, made on Marc Maron’s “WTF” podcast:

“They were very proud to cast a Latino actress as Snow White, but you’re still telling the story of ‘Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.’ Take a step back and look at what you’re doing there. It makes no sense to me. You’re progressive in one way, but you’re still making that fucking backward story about seven dwarfs living in a cave together. Have I done nothing to advance the cause from my soapbox? I guess I’m not loud enough.”

Well…huh. Much hay is made about how Dinklage (an actor whose work I greatly admire), as an LP (little person) actor, has broken down stereotypes, playing complex and non-traditional roles previously unknown to actors of his stature, from Cyrano de Bergerac to his wonderful portrayal of Tyrion Lannister in Game of Thrones. Still, the storylines of these parts center on the prejudice and discrimination little people have to overcome…so who’s underscoring dwarf disadvantages here? It’s clear that Dinklage’s statements, and the sentiments that they aroused, influenced the choice Disney made to take the seven dwarfs out of Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs. In response to Dinklage's comments, the studio stated that "to avoid reinforcing stereotypes from the original animated film, we are taking a different approach with these seven characters and have been consulting with members of the dwarfism community." Stereotypes? These dwarfs were stand up guys. But, apparently, the members of the “dwarfism community” consulted think it’s preferable to reject seven plum acting jobs for dwarf actors. Based on the leaked photo from the Snow White set making the rounds (see below), of the seven diverse actors playing the non-dwarfs(?), there appears to be one token little person. How is this progress for the dwarfism community?

The Six Something-or-others and One Dwarf

“It’s not a progression at all, to me,” said actor Dylan Postl, also known to pro wrestling fans as “Hornswaggle,” in an interview with Piers Morgan. “There are actors, dwarf actors, that dream to be in a major motion picture such as this Disney remake, and now, because Peter Dinklage said what he said last year, now, it’s taken away.” Hornswaggle is turning out to be a powerful voice for his community. He recently came out against the casting of Hugh Grant as an “Oompa Loompa” in the forthcoming Wonka remake—another role that could have provided work for a little person. “It’s not right, because these are roles made for actors of my stature; roles that aren’t ever really given. I can’t go out for the Harrison Ford or George Clooney roles.” He also stresses that doubles and stunt doubles on Snow White would have been dwarf performers as well. Postl called out Dinklage’s hypocrisy by stating, “He had, in the past, no issue cashing checks that were made for dwarf roles, like Elf…that check cleared just fine.”

Peter Dinklage in Elf, 2003

I am continually baffled by the scattershot manner in which Woke Hollywood seeks to impose progressive ideals on motion pictures. The standards are inconsistent at best, and incoherent at worst. How can the industry on one side mandate, for example, that trans roles be played by trans actors, and gay roles by gay actors, but completely erase dwarf roles that could be played by dwarf actors, in some misguided attempt to avoid perpetrating “dwarf stereotypes?” Instead of more inclusion for little people, Disney is using a classic tale about a girl and some dwarfs to provide inclusion for—well, based on that leaked photo?—an extremely tall white guy, two nondescript middle-aged white guys with bad hair, a Black woman with spacebuns, two short Black guys, and…oh hey! A lone dwarf. It’s these kinds of moronic, virtue signaling, precious, pandering casting debacles that turn off audiences and the industry alike. These stunts do nothing but backfire: costly blunders like the Bud Light disaster and the epic fail Queen Cleopatra. Meanwhile, congratulations, Disney—you managed, whilst assiduously attempting to avoid hurting the dwarfism community, to succeed spectacularly at hurting the dwarfism community.

Rachel Zegler, captured on the set of Snow White

As for any yadda-yadda about a half-Colombian actress playing Snow White? Meh. I don’t see any great innovation there. Rachel Zegler is Latinx Lite, if you ask me—in fact, Spielberg was criticized by the enforcers of racial purity for using Zegler, and not casting a full-blooded Puerto Rican actress as Maria in his West Side Story. I do wish Ms. Zegler would stop giving interviews, and making annoying A-list, tone-deaf comments from the SAG-AFTRA picket line. She’s quoted in The Hollywood Reporter as saying, “People are making these jokes about ours being the PC Snow White, where it's like, yeah, it is—because it needed that. It's an 85-year-old cartoon, and our version is a refreshing story about a young woman who has a function beyond “Someday My Prince Will Come.”

Okay, Zoomer. Calling one of the most innovative and artistically brilliant films of all time a cartoon? Nincompoop. Whatever the Woke virus that’s severely impaired the artistic and business minds at Disney, that little bon mot should enrage all who appreciate and cherish the staggering accomplishment that is Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs, and the pioneering genius who changed the world with his vision: Walt Disney.

Come here, Rachel darling, and put this apple in your mouth.